Saying good-bye.

«via»

At first, it really seems strange to say goodbye to something that i know it will happen only within 6 months. But it is due to the fact that yesterday we bought, at last, our one way ticket to home and that made me feel a litlle bit «out of place» inside my deepest self.

I have talked a little bit about my first experience here before, but it is funny to say that - different from everybody that i know -, i could never imagine how much i could myself grow some roots in a place that is by far quite different from my actual home.

In this case, it brings to my mind another question: what is really home to someone? I used to think that «home» would always - would ever be - the place i was born. However, it took me around 6 months to change my view about this misconception. Finally, during the summer of 2009, i accepted Porto as my home by heart.

And then...time has passed so fast.

Only a few days ago i realized - during some walks around the town - how much i´m gonna miss all this city has always offered to me - its history, its cafés, its silence, its cold and greyish sky during winter, its deep bright blue sky during the summer, its parks (especially this one - my favourite place on earth), its food, and the most important fact - many great friends that we made (me and my husband) during these almost two years of our lives...

Falling.

The cold is finally getting here together with the high and strong winds of November.

Although i find this very fascinating, i can´t wait to see my dears in my hometown again.

But at the same time i am so nervous. I don´t know what i can expect, because it´s the first time i´ve been so long away from home. I wish i could have more time there to divide myself to everybody, but i am afraid it´s not gonna be possible.

The one that i really want to be with is my beloved 14-year-old cat, who is actually very sick...this makes me very sad, because she´s like my own skin, a part of me.

Until there, in fifteen days, i will try to enjoy my friends here as much as i can, because i´m coming back only in January and stay here for another long time.

All that you can´t leave behind.

ffffound!

It´s been one year since I left my city behind.

However, it didn´t change my heart at all, although i feel different in "a different place".

Well, but i can say that i learned too much, at least i think so.

I learned how to handle:

the pain ("desperation is a tender trap, it gets you every time," Bono said once. This is the most difficult one, i´m still learning.)

the difficulties.

my low self - esteem (a little bit, i have to work it out better).

I learned:

how to study harder.

that i could be very good in my subjects when i tried harder.

that living in small place (my room) changes everything.

how to survive without tv (and i still can´t have one).

to enjoy the cold breeze.

to enjoy some portuguese people.

to love beer (i used to hate).

But i can´t never leave behind things that are part of myself, like:

the fact that i still cry about people and things that are in my hometown.

my pets.

my nephews.

the beach (how i miss one).

my guitar.

the cover bands (U2 and Beatles).

my true friends.

"And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make."

The Beatles